I was wondering the other day. What could the City Commission of Henderson do to improve my quality of life? They have done such a great job of managing the city’s assets, social engineering sexual behavior and looking after the health and well being of it’s citizens that a new regulation may be in order. Yes, I think we may need a new ordinance. One day I was sitting around the Powell Street Parthenon, (Metzger’s) enjoying my favorite Bordeaux and chowing down on the plate lunch special of Cordon Bleu and caviar when a table of very insensitive North-end soccer mom’s cell phones rudely interrupted me. All of these brightly colored cells phones sounded like chimes and twinkly music boxes when they rang. Here I am trying to cleanse my palate and partake of the fine east-end cuisine when out of the blue comes jabbering women catching up on each others grocery coupons and yeast infections. We don’t need these cell phones in upscale bistros like Metzgers. Why can’t they just go to yuppy hangouts like Captain D’s and Shoney’s? Why do they have to impose their disrespectful and rude behavior upon the good citizens of Henderson? Haven’t the good people of Metzger’s suffered enough during the last year? When will this madness end? Can’t the City Commissioners do something? This is just too much. When will someone in city government come to their senses and put an end to this madness? It’s enough to make a Southern Baptist cuss.